by John Pace
When setting up your child custody plan after a divorce or a breakup, the court system will always take into account the child's best interests. Depending on how old the child is, the court system may also consider what your child wants. If your child is insistent that they live with one parent, or that they do not want to live with one of their parents, the judge presiding over your case may take their preferences into consideration.
However, there is no one specific age that allows a child to decide which parent to live with in South Carolina unless they reach the age of 18 and become a legal adult. With help from a compassionate and experienced Beaufort child custody lawyer from Fender Law Firm, you can protect your child's wishes and set up a parenting plan that works best for your family.
The Child’s Age Can Determine Whether the Judge Takes Their Wishes into Consideration
It is up to the judge presiding over your case whether your child has any say in where they live when you are in the middle of custody proceedings. The younger the child, the less credence their preferences may be given. However, once a child reaches the age of 15 or 16, if they can give a reasonable explanation for why they would prefer to live with one parent over the other, the judge may be more willing to implement a custody order with those wishes in mind per S.C. Code § 63-15-30.
If a younger child, between the ages of, say, 10 and 14, was willing to go before the judge and maturely explain their reasoning, the judge can take their preferences into account when determining your family’s parenting plan and child custody arrangements.
Factors That Impact Custody Arrangements
It is not only the child's wishes that determine what your family’s custody arrangement looks like. All child custody arrangements must serve the best interests of your child. According to South Carolina Code § 63-7-20, there are multiple factors that will be taken into account when determining what a "child's best interests" are. Some examples of these factors could include:
- The parents’ preferences
- The child's developmental needs
- Whether either parent has a history of criticizing the other in front of their child
- Either parent’s ability to meet their child's needs
- The child's preferences
- Both parents’ ability to be actively involved in their child's life
- Whether either parent has moved more than 100 miles from the child’s primary residence
- The parent's and child's physical and mental health
- The relationship between the children, their parents, any siblings, and other family members
- Whether either parent is encouraging the child to have a relationship with the other parent
- Whether either parent neglected or abused the child or their siblings
- The stability of the existing or proposed primary residence for the child
What Do I Do If My Child Does Not Want to Live With Their Other Parent?
If your child does not want to live with their other parent, the judge will need to consider your child's preferences when setting your custody arrangements. The judge will also need to consider how old your child is, their maturity level, and why they do not want to live with their other parent.
In some cases, the court system may find it appropriate to override the child's preferences, particularly if the child's wishes are not in their best interests. For instance, the child may express a desire to live with one parent, but if that parent has a history of child abuse, domestic violence, or neglect, the court system would not be able to grant that parent primary physical custody, as it would not be in the best interest of the child to do so.
However, the older the child gets, the less willing the judge may be to compel the child to live with one parent, particularly if they want to live with the other. For example, if an older teen does not want to spend weekends at one parent’s home, the court system may be unwilling to implement an order forcing the child to comply, as this could do more harm than good.
Proving the Unfitness of a Parent
It is more common than you might think for a child to prefer to live with one parent, even if that parent is unfit. If this is the case, you will need to go into court with powerful evidence that can prove your child's other parent is unfit. Some factors that could indicate unfitness include:
- Abuse of drugs or alcohol
- An inability, or lack of willingness, to communicate appropriately with the child
- An inability to meet the child's needs
- Refusing to seek help for a documented mental health issue
- Refusing to set age-appropriate limits, such as allowing the child to consume alcohol or watch inappropriate content
- Refusing to allow the child to participate in activities
- Failure to attend the child's extracurricular events
- History of neglect, child abuse, or domestic violence
- Consistently disparaging or sabotaging the relationship between the child and their other parent
- Refusing to compromise or cooperate with the child’s other parent
Connect With a High-Powered South Carolina Child Custody Lawyer Today
Your child's age does not necessarily determine whether they will have a say in which parent they live with. But if your child is mature enough to express their wishes and has shared reasonable explanations for why they want to live with one parent over the other, the judge may take their preferences into account when setting up your child's custody plan.
Remember, the family courts will always make decisions that they believe are in the best interests of your child. If at all possible, you should try to come to a custody arrangement with your child’s other parent in advance so these decisions are not taken out of your hands. Meet with a reputable Beaufort divorce attorney from Fender Law Firm to get your parenting plan and child custody arrangements resolved sooner. Fill out our online contact form or call us to schedule your confidential consultation as soon as today.
